Reference

Glossary of family court terms.

Family court has its own vocabulary — part legal, part procedural, part psychological. This glossary gives you plain-English definitions for the terms most likely to come up in a contested case. Where helpful, terms link out to deeper articles.

A
Affidavit
A written statement of facts, made under oath, used as evidence in court. Every word matters; perjury risk is real. Read your own affidavits carefully before signing and before testifying about them later.
Alienation also: parental alienation
A sustained pattern of behavior by one parent that damages the child's relationship with the other parent. Hard to address in court because the diagnostic category is contested and children's preferences are evaluated carefully. More →
Allegations
Claims made by one party that have not yet been proven. Family court is full of allegations on both sides; the job of evidence is to convert allegations into findings.
Amicus attorney
An attorney appointed by the court to advocate for what is in the child's best interest. Distinct from a Guardian ad Litem in some jurisdictions; functions similarly. More on GALs →
Answer
The formal response to a petition or complaint, filed by the responding party. Sets out admissions, denials, and any affirmative defenses or counter-claims.
B
Best interest of the child
The legal standard most family courts use to make custody decisions. Factored from a list of considerations — child's needs, parental fitness, stability, relationships, sometimes the child's preferences — the exact list varies by jurisdiction.
BIFF Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm
A communication framework for high-conflict situations. Keeps messages short, factual, neutrally-toned, and firm without being demanding. Originally developed by Bill Eddy. Useful in co-parenting app communication.
C
Caucus mediation
A mediation structure where the parties are kept in separate rooms and the mediator shuttles between them. Generally safer than joint-session mediation in high-conflict cases. More →
Collaborative law
A formal alternative-dispute-resolution process where both parties and their attorneys agree to resolve issues without going to court. If the process breaks down, the attorneys are typically required to withdraw. Often inappropriate for high-conflict cases.
Contempt
A finding that a party has willfully disobeyed a court order. Can result in fines, attorney fee awards, makeup parenting time, or, in extreme cases, jail. The standard of proof is high.
Co-parenting
Shared parenting between separated or divorced parents. Often the assumed goal in family court — sometimes inappropriate when one party is high-conflict, in which case parallel parenting may fit better.
Co-parenting app
Apps like OurFamilyWizard, TalkingParents, AppClose, and 2houses designed to centralize communication, scheduling, and expenses between co-parents. Often court-ordered in high-conflict cases. More →
CPS also: DCF, DSS, ACS, child welfare
Child Protective Services. Government agency that investigates reports of abuse and neglect. In high-conflict cases, sometimes weaponized via false reports. More →
Cross-examination
Questioning of an opposing party's witness by your attorney. In high-conflict cases, often the moment when an HCP's true behavior becomes visible to the court. More →
Custodial parent
The parent with primary physical custody. Distinct from legal custody in some jurisdictions.
Custody evaluator
A mental-health professional appointed by the court (or chosen by parties) to conduct a structured assessment of parenting capacity, family dynamics, and the children's needs. More →
D
Decree
The final order of a court in a divorce case. Establishes the legal end of the marriage and the terms (custody, support, property division) going forward.
Deposition
Pre-trial sworn testimony, recorded, conducted outside the courtroom. Typically used for discovery and to lock in a party's account before trial. Statements in deposition can be used against the witness later.
Discovery
The formal pre-trial process of exchanging information between the parties. Includes document requests, interrogatories, depositions, and subpoenas. Can be weaponized in high-conflict cases. More →
Dissolution
Another term for divorce. Used in some jurisdictions in place of "divorce."
Domestic violence
A pattern of abusive behavior in an intimate relationship, used to gain or maintain control. Encompasses physical, sexual, emotional, financial, and psychological abuse. Affects custody outcomes when documented.
E
Emergency motion
A motion filed on an accelerated timeline for an urgent matter. Sometimes legitimate, sometimes weaponized to force the other party into a courtroom on short notice for non-emergencies. More →
Evidence
Information, testimony, documents, or physical items presented to a court to prove or disprove a fact. Different from allegations — evidence is what allegations are supported by.
Ex parte
A motion or order made when only one party is present. Used for genuine emergencies but sometimes abused. Usually limited in duration; followed by a hearing where both parties can be heard.
F
Finding of fact
A formal determination by a court that a particular fact is true, based on the evidence presented. Distinct from a settlement, which doesn't produce findings — only orders.
Flying monkeys
A colloquial term, borrowed from The Wizard of Oz, for the third parties an HCP recruits into the conflict — family, friends, professionals, sometimes the children. More →
G
GAL Guardian ad Litem
A person (often an attorney or trained social worker) appointed by the court to represent the best interests of the child in a custody dispute. Investigates, observes, and makes recommendations to the court. More →
Gaslighting
A pattern of manipulation in which the manipulator denies events, contradicts memory, and reframes accurate observations — until the target doubts their own perception. Common in high-conflict family cases. More →
H
HCP High-Conflict Personality
An individual whose behavior in conflict consistently escalates rather than resolves the conflict. May include narcissistic, antisocial, borderline, or histrionic traits, though formal diagnosis is not required. More →
Hearsay
An out-of-court statement offered to prove the truth of what it says. Generally not admissible in court, with significant exceptions. Affects how some kinds of evidence can be used.
I
In camera
Literally "in chambers." A proceeding held in private — often used when judges interview children directly, out of either parent's presence.
Interrogatories
Written questions one party sends to the other during discovery, to be answered under oath in writing. Often used to lock down the other side's account of events.
J
Joint custody
Shared custody between both parents, which may be joint legal (decision-making), joint physical (parenting time), or both. The structure varies enormously by jurisdiction and case.
Judge pro tem
A temporary or substitute judge. Sometimes a senior attorney sitting on a case in the absence of the regular judge. Worth knowing if your hearing is unexpectedly reassigned.
Jurisdiction
The authority of a particular court to hear a particular case. Determined by residence, location of children, prior orders, and other factors. In family law, often the most important early procedural question.
L
Legal custody
The right to make major decisions about the children — education, healthcare, religion. Distinct from physical custody. Often shared even when physical custody is not.
Litigation
The legal process of resolving disputes through the court. In high-conflict cases, sometimes itself the weapon. More →
M
Mediation
A structured negotiation between the parties facilitated by a neutral third party. Often required before trial. Can be productive or weaponized depending on case dynamics. More →
Modification
A change to an existing court order, typically requiring a showing of a substantial change in circumstances. Modification petitions are sometimes weaponized by HCPs.
Motion
A formal request asking the court to take a specific action. Motions to compel, modify, enforce, dismiss, and so on. The pace of motions in a case is often a signal of how it's being litigated.
N
Narcissistic Personality Disorder NPD
A clinical diagnosis characterized by grandiosity, need for admiration, lack of empathy, and related traits. Not the same as colloquial "narcissism." Formal NPD diagnoses are rare in court cases; the operational behavior is what gets litigated. More →
Non-custodial parent
The parent without primary physical custody. Has parenting time as defined in the order, decision-making rights as defined in the order, and child-support obligations as defined in the order.
O
Order
A formal direction from a court. Must be obeyed once entered. Violation can result in contempt.
OurFamilyWizard
One of the most-used co-parenting apps. Often court-ordered in high-conflict cases. Strong record-export features. More →
P
Parallel parenting
A coparenting model designed for high-conflict cases, in which the parents operate as separately as possible, with minimal communication and rigidly defined parenting time. More ↗
Parenting coordinator PC
A neutral third party, often a mental health professional or attorney, appointed to manage day-to-day disputes between high-conflict co-parents. May have decision-making authority on minor disputes.
Parenting plan
The detailed written agreement (or order) describing custody, parenting time, decision-making, holidays, communication, and dispute resolution. In high-conflict cases, the more specific the plan, the better.
Petition
The opening filing in a family law case. Sets out what the petitioner is asking the court to do.
Physical custody
Where the children physically reside. Can be primary (with one parent most of the time) or joint/shared. Distinct from legal custody.
Projection
A psychological defense in which a person attributes their own behavior, traits, or motives to someone else. Common in HCP filings, where false accusations often mirror the accuser's own conduct. More →
Pro se
Representing yourself in court without an attorney. Possible, sometimes necessary, but usually inadvisable in high-conflict cases.
Protective order
A court order designed to protect one party from contact, harassment, or abuse by another. Process and standards vary by jurisdiction.
R
Restraining order
A court order prohibiting specific conduct. Often confused with a protective order, though usage varies by jurisdiction.
Reunification therapy
A therapeutic process used in cases of damaged or estranged parent-child relationships, often deployed in alienation cases. Conducted by a court-appointed therapist. More →
S
Sanctions
Court-imposed penalties — usually monetary — for improper conduct, frivolous filings, or violations of orders. A key tool against weaponized litigation. More →
Settlement
A negotiated resolution of a case, in whole or in part, agreed to by the parties rather than imposed by the court. Often preferable when terms can be enforced. More →
Smear campaign
A coordinated effort by an HCP to damage your reputation among shared connections, family, professionals, and the public. Often runs in parallel with litigation. More →
Standing order
An order entered automatically by the court at the opening of a case (or upon certain events), governing temporary conduct — typically restricting major financial moves and certain parenting actions during the pendency of the case.
Subpoena
A court order requiring someone to appear, testify, or produce documents. Used in discovery and at trial.
Supervised visitation
Parenting time conducted in the presence of a supervisor (professional, family member, or therapeutic supervisor). Used in cases where safety or alienation concerns require it.
T
Temporary orders
Orders entered early in a case, before final resolution. Govern the period from filing to final order. Often deeply consequential because they establish the practical reality the case is litigated against.
Triangulation
A communication pattern in which one party routes communication through a third party rather than directly to the intended target. Common HCP tactic. More →
V
Vexatious litigant
A designation given to a party with a documented history of meritless or harassing filings. Once designated, the party may need court approval before filing new actions. A real tool against weaponized litigation, though rarely invoked. More →
Visitation also: parenting time, access
The non-custodial parent's scheduled time with the children. Terminology is shifting in many jurisdictions toward "parenting time" or "access" as more child-centered language.
W
Walkaway position
The set of terms below which you will not settle. Established in advance, in writing, with your attorney. Your anchor in mediation. More →
Weaponized litigation
Use of the legal process — motions, discovery, continuances, appeals — primarily to harass, drain, or pressure the other party, rather than to resolve genuine issues. More →

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Every term in this glossary is unpacked, contextualized, and turned into actionable strategy in Family Court Solutions — the attorney-written guide to defeating narcissists, bullies, and liars in divorce and custody battles.

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